Just a little announcement - I am looking for summer housing in NYC. So if you have family, friends or friends of friends who are interested in subletting their place, please let me know. Thanks!

It struck me yesterday that Covey's Habit #2 "Begin with the End in Mind" and #3 "Put First Things First" (see entry below) is analogous to Jesus' illustration of the man building a house and laying a foundation on rock in Luke 6:46-49. That is, the man who builds his house on the foundation of Jesus' words (the rock), is setting things aright from the very beginning. The end in mind is a solid house that will weather all storms and troubles. Likewise, a life well lived (well-built, I guess I could say) starts with the fundamentals of God's principles. As I recall a pastor in Berkeley say, "What's your blueprint?"

As I've been running (sometimes feverishly) on the treadmill that is 2L year of law school, I often don't get a chance to sit down and think, What's my blueprint? Am I building on the foundation that is rock, or do I lack a foundation?

I think about the summer I am to spend in NYC and feel at times a little overwhelmed that little me is going to join a huge firm of sophisticated and smart lawyers in a city that is hardly known for slowing down to lend a hand... That is, I've caught myself worrying that I won't fit in. Worrying that I won't be able to keep up or that I won't be able to cut it. That I'll be seen as incompetent, slow, passive, boring, ignorant, nondescript... etc. etc. In short, I've been fretting about the coming winds and floods... before they even get here. Assuming that they even do get here! Worrying about the not-given or not-yet-given!

I forget about the foundation aspect. And I suppose the analogy sorta breaks down here, but... instead I should be looking to either trusting in the foundation that's been laid (that Jesus' words are true and can be trusted and that I've followed them the best I know how and He will provide) or looking to shore up that foundation (re-evaluating if my blueprint is right and if so, have I been building properly on it?)

Either action precludes my worrying about the storms that may or may not come. First, I do trust that the Lord provided this job for me... even though I have doubts about its fit or compatibility. I need to also believe that means He can see me through a summer too! I have no ideas about the long-term plan, but then, when was I supposed to be privy to God's future for me? As for evaluating the blueprint and the building itself, that definitely takes more time and energy than I have to waste on useless (and possibly baseless, I recognize) anxiety.

Problem solved! Gee, I'm so glad I'm so rational. Ha!


**And as a tribute to great junior-high praise songs... I offer to you:

"Don't build your house upon a sandy land
Don't build it too near the shore
Well it might look kinda nice
But you'll have to build it twice
Oh, you'll have to build your house once more.

You better build your house upon a rock
A good foundation and a solid spot
Oh the storms may come and go
But the peace of God you will know."

Have any of you read "Seven Habits of Highly Effective People" by Stephen Covey?

It's really one of the better self-improvement type books I've read out on the market. Ok, ok, not that I've read that many. And yes, it's a little cheesy at times... but I think the principles are basically pretty sound and biblical (not meaning he uses Scripture, but that I think the Bible would affirm many of the foundational truths behind those principles. Also, please note that I believe Mr. Covey is a Mormon, hence he believes in God and Truth, but this work attempts to provide principles for a wide audience of both religious and secular types. It's not really trying to be a religious or spiritual book.)

Mr. Covey says that most of our effectiveness is hindered by attempting to change based on a Personality Ethic (that is, quick-fix behavior modification.) The analogy would be putting a band-aid on chronic pain. Rather, the key to real change is based on perseverance in the Character Ethic (that is, a paradigm shift or putting on a different pair of lens into how we see the world and things around us.) So, we should set the broken arm aright or understand the root of the chronic pain instead of trying to make these cosmetic changes or take some social aspirin.

Most of its premise is based on moving away from dependence (circumstances and other people dictate your life) to independence (you can do all things on your own) to the final stage of interdependence (working with others synergistically to create the greatest good.) He says you must grow in those successive stages... many people never get out of the first, others mistakenly believe the second is the best, while effective people know that the third stage is where greatest success takes place.

Moving from dependence to independence includes:

Habit #1: Be Proactive.
Habit #2: Begin with the End in Mind.
Habit #3: Put First Things First.

Moving from independence to interdependence includes:

Habit #4: Think Win/Win
Habit #5: Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood
Habit #6: Synergize

Then the act of renewal:

Habit #7: Sharpen the Saw

I've only read through Habit #2, but I think it's pretty dead-on. You know, I think Pastor Keng has read this book b/c it sounds like a lot of the advice he's given me before! Now if only I could actually practice these things! Mr. Covey has perhaps not articulated an important assumption... that as sinful human things we can actually accomplish this on our own. Instead, he should just admit, Man this stuff is hard and it can only be done by our efforts propelled by the grace of God.

Whoa, dude. So my little sister now has a BOYFRIEND! I need to get used to the idea, since it's her very first one. I won't give away any more details, you'll have to ask her yourself...

ohhhhh - the TV series "24" is SO GOOD. i'm totally addicted. we're only through episode 15 of the first season. it started at 12am, and we are now at 3pm. (no, we didn't watch it straight through.. though i know people who have. just 3 episodes tonight.) mama mia! it's one of those bite-on-your-knuckles, no-relief kind of suspense shows.

deception, intrigue, blood, love, loyalty, familial bonds, marriage conflict, terrorism, conspiracy, enemies, friends, politics, revenge, mayhem .... and what characters! what acting! it is difficult to stop the madness.

as sacrilegious as it sounds, i think it will replace ALIAS as my favorite show.

Okay, if you read my March 10 post, I must give credit to the amazing, "That's Incredible!" Isaac Fong for finding those movies on the web. Isaac, you are like Google, only nicer.

Check these out:
A Thief In the Night

No kidding, they even have Mandarin Chinese versions.

'Tis the Season to Get Married!

And of course, a very warm congratulations to Nate Mah and Kim Guignard, another set of to-be-marrieds!

All you need to know about Nate is that he wears a computer bug every single day. Yes, attached to his shirt, every single day. Okay, not a live one, but it's made out of a computer chip with a safety pin, and has those little plastic rolling eyeballs and antenna. I think he only takes it off when he goes to bed. And no, he cannot leave the house without it, or he'd feel naked. On top of that, he's actually quite proud of it.

CONGRATULATIONS to my dear friends Elaine Lo and Paul Lai! They are attempting to tie the knot in July. Brave souls (i.e. wedding planning in about three months, not that they are marrying each other. haha.) Elaine was one of my dear college roommates, and though she's terrible at keeping in touch, certainly a lifelong friend. (Paul, on the other hand, is just a kook.)

I'm to be a bridesmaid for the very first time!

Ohhh. It is the beginning of the end. I turned in the first draft of The Paper to the Editor-in-Chief. If she denies my paper publication, it'll be the end of the end (which, honestly, after making edits and writing for nearly 24 hours straight, doesn't sound bad at all.)

I'm in the terrible quandary of whether I should just go to bed, wake up and then study. Or if I should just push through for a few more hours, study, and then go to bed. At this rate, I'll probably just be a zombie and do neither.

Something happened today that jolted me to recognize my sorry state.

A good friend of mine, my partner for the Immigration Clinic, and I were just sitting around the office talking and the topic of religion came up. She is from Romania, and she has some religious background in the Orthodox Romanian, Catholic, and Protestant (this is some specific denomination in Romania, not the more general Reformation kind of Protestant, I think) faiths. From my understanding, religion is far more a larger part of the traditional culture there.

My friend though, doesn't hold any particular beliefs herself (perhaps a general belief in God and doing good to others, perhaps agnostic.) But she is pretty open to talking about it. She told me that in Romania, Easter is a big celebratory affair. Perhaps not unlike the way Christmas in America kind of takes hold of everything for months ahead of the holiday. I told her about our church's upcoming Easter Service, that it was to be rather informal and a big time of giving "testimony" or people sharing about what God has done in their lives.

Shen then asked me, "What has God done in your life?" When she saw my surprise at her question, she said, "No really. I'm not being sarcastic, I really want to know."

Whoosh. It was like everything in my brain had departed. I was totally blank.

I then attempted to answer her question by giving her a little history about how I became a Christian, that I had a very uninteresting story b/c I didn't have a crazy background of being a wild child with drug problems or running around with the wrong crowds. I told her that in all likelihood, I would've been the good Asian kid even without God.

It gets worse.

I then told her how I started believing in seventh grade, sort of "knew" God in high school, and went through a big questioning period in college where my faith was confirmed and became really my own, etc etc.

She was politely listening throughout, said something about how faith makes some people really happy and they have hope and it's a good thing. She herself was rather skeptical when it camed to religion.

Throughout this time, I felt like I should've just kicked myself. Really, really hard. In essence, I never answered her question. I gave her this big general sketch of my life with religion, and never told her WHAT HAS GOD DONE IN MY LIFE. As I'm even thinking about it now, I think... well, what has He done anyway?

I'd be totally down with discussing issues of ethics or why it's rational to believe in God, presuppositions and post-modernism haze... but when it comes to talking about what has GOD (the Personal, Omniscient, Omnipotent, All-Loving, Eternal God who has inserted Himself into history as Christ) in my life (saving from sin, redeeming, giving me a new heart to love and serve and know Him, giving me hope and security in the life to come, giving me purpose and ability to live a meaningful life in the here and now)... I came up totally empty. Instead, I gave a weak, tepid, institutionalized version of religion in a "good" person's life. Pathetic.

What good am I anyway? I mean, I know I'm no gifted evangelist by any stretch of the imagination, but to give her THAT?!?! Instead of the glorious, beautiful fullness of knowing Christ... described so eloquently and persuasively by writers like C.S. Lewis... I offer her no value in knowing Christ. No meaning, purpose, joy, beauty, love. Who cares if one can speak of philosophy and the Meaning of Life, when one cannot even speak of the experience of knowing the Lord Himself?

It was perhaps nearly as bad as a flat-out Simon Peter denial. Lord, forgive me. Have mercy on me, a sinner. That I do not know You as I should, nor do I represent You as You are. In fact, I water you down until you become unrecognizeable as the true Living God.

Congratulations to my cousin Bun and his fiancee Edie! They are to be married in late July.

Bun is a great guy... I really got to know him when I moved to Berkeley for undergrad. He became the big bro I never had... helped me move in, bought a printer and set it up for me, took me on regular trips to Ranch 99 Market for Chinese groceries and we'd have boba together afterwards. Funny thing is, he used to bemoan his singleness and "bad luck" with women. Haha. Ah, those were the days.